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The Cycle of Obligation

How I lost my voice

April 17, 20244 min read

Las week I literally lost my voice. I picked up the respiratory virus that has been going around and the result was a very raspy difficult to understand voice. As I progressed through the weekend, I realized that the metaphor was bigger than just losing my voice from being sick. I had lost my business voice.

You may be thinking "How could that happen?" or "What does that even mean?" Stick with me here and I will try to clarify it.

In January, I launched "Living Abundantly" as the business name for my coaching practice. I was rebranding myself to include my newly acquired Habit Finder certification. You may or may not be aware that I have been an Optavia Program Coach for about 3 years. While my intent was not to walk away from Optavia, I knew I needed to focus on developing my Habit Finder coaching business.

One of my high risk sabotaging habits of thinking is that of Obligation. I do things because "I should" and "I must" rather than "I get to" and "I choose to". The result is I get caught up in a cycle that leads to feeling frustrated, guilty and overwhelmed because I am doing things that I do not enjoy and take time and energy away from the things I want to do related to Living Abundantly. I was so deep in my cycle of obligation that I even attended a weekend event, knowing it was going to muddy my thoughts even more. I told myself and others that I was attending because "I had already paid for it and did not want to let others down." Really?? Like my presence was going to make that much difference.

I am learning that this is a habit of thinking that I am going to have to work extra hard to overcome. God has led me to a purpose of supporting and teaching women how to navigate life transitions (another story for another day), and I am worried about letting someone down over a weekend event that was not going to move me closer to achieving that purpose!! Now who am I letting down!

The result was that I spent weeks focused on obligations that I should do rather than the work I love! James 1:8 says "A double minded man is unstable in all his ways." I cannot focus on my God given direction if I am looking around making sure I am not letting others down. It not only quiets my message it completely silences it.

I share this to demonstrate what it means to work on our habits of thinking. We all have areas that our thinking is so deeply engrained, we do not even realize how it impacts our ability to function. They keep us locked in patterns that we can change, but only with awareness and effort to make the change, but I assure you it leads to amazing freedom in life!One of my high risk sabotaging habits of thinking is that of Obligation. I do things because "I should" and "I must" rather than "I get to" and "I choose to". The result is I get caught up in a cycle that leads to feeling frustrated, guilty and overwhelmed because I am doing things that I do not enjoy and take time and energy away from the things I want to do related to Living Abundantly. I was so deep in my cycle of obligation that I even attended a weekend event, knowing it was going to muddy my thoughts even more. I told myself and others that I was attending because "I had already paid for it and did not want to let others down." Really?? Like my presence was going to make that much difference.

I am learning that this is a habit of thinking that I am going to have to work extra hard to overcome. God has led me to a purpose of supporting and teaching women how to navigate life transitions (another story for another day), and I am worried about letting someone down over a weekend event that was not going to move me closer to achieving that purpose!! Now who am I letting down!

The result was that I spent weeks focused on obligations that I should do rather than the work I love! James 1:8 says "A double minded man is unstable in all his ways." I cannot focus on my God given direction if I am looking around making sure I am not letting others down. It not only quiets my message it completely silences it.

I share this to demonstrate what it means to work on our habits of thinking. We all have areas that our thinking is so deeply engrained, we do not even realize how it impacts our ability to function. They keep us locked in patterns that we can change, but only with awareness and effort to make the change, but I assure you it leads to amazing freedom in life!

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Lorraine Brown

"Are you feeling lost and without a purpose? Rediscover the dreams you had as a little girl. Life may have reshaped them, but now it's your turn to focus on what truly fulfills you. I work with women over 50 to help transform these dreams into a vibrant vision for your future. Let's reignite that childhood wonder & turn your aspirations into reality. It's time to create a life that excites you every day."

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